Quantcast
Channel: evolgen » Manatees
Browsing latest articles
Browse All 9 View Live

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Manatees Invade the Northeast

Once is an accident, twice is a coincidence, but three times is a trend. The manatee in the Hudson River was an accident — the Christopher Columbus of manatees if you will. The manatee in Rhode Island...

View Article



They Live . . . in the North

No ocean, river, or fjord is safe. The manatees are attacking. We’ve warned you before. Now is the time to take notice. Three times is a trend.

View Article

Manatees Aren’t Dumb

They just act stoned. As Dean Wormer would tell you, “Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life.” We can rule out that manatees are drunk — although alcohol run off from Panama City Beach may...

View Article

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

You’re Only Making them More Eager to Begin the Invasion

Jacob appears to be an enemy combatant in the War on ManateesTM. They are attacking the Northeast United States via our inland waterways. Jacob, who lives west of the continental divide, is safe from...

View Article

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

I Warned You About the Manatees!

Don’t say I didn’t warn you. We have irrefutable evidence that the manatees are attacking. We’re only now gaining insights into their advance technology. Only a week ago did I say to Sandy: And I’m...

View Article


Manatee Genomics

We’ve told you about the manatees making their move from the southeastern United States to the northeast. We warned you that the sea cows ain’t as dumb as you thought they were. We took you inside...

View Article

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

The Motivations of the Attack are Made Clear

URGENT: We have a new update from the War Against Manatees. The Bad Reporter has a dispatch from the great manatee migration. While the enviro-terrorists are claiming global warming is to blame, we...

View Article

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Culling a Threat to Our Liberty

Manatees may be reclassified as threatened; they are currently listed as endangered. Any good patriot will recognize this as a smart move to defend our safety. If we can stop them before they reach...

View Article


Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Giant Squids, Other Squids, and Manatees

Dr. Doris Haggis-on-Whey and her husband Benny, as part of their H-O-W series of books, have produced an absolutely dispensable piece of misinformation, the third in a series of we can only hope not...

View Article

Browsing latest articles
Browse All 9 View Live




Latest Images